Women's Studies Bar Crawl

Every year, the nursing department has a bar crawl. They have clever t-shirts.

this year, the women's studies department will do the same (hopefully).

I am making tshirts. I need a witty saying for these t-shirts. Any ideas?

Poetry.

I LOVE spoken word poetry. I love it. Especcially when it's as good as Andrea Gibson. She is my favorite. Please check this out. It's so raw but so, so, so good.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kBU7xTS1Ss

Just a different medium.

I think I'm into cakes right now. Not necessarily baking them (all though, I enjoy that part too) but decorating them. That's my favorite. I used to be an art major, so really it just feels like I'm using a different medium to work with. Icing. I think I want to get serious about it one day. Not ace of cakes serious...but I'd do it for a living. Hells yeah, I would.


I made this cake for my friend, Amy's birthday. Which was today. ( :) ).

I made this cake for my friend Grace. It's an african safari. She said she liked giraffes.

paralyzed

I was twenty years old when I saw my first dying man.
He was hunched over, in the fetal position, on his bed at the nursing home.
His fingers were knotted and wrinkled, much like my own.
The sound of his slow and heavy breath,
like the waves hitting the shore after a thunderstorm,
haunted my dreams.
Breathing like someone told him the rhythm would launch him to God-
He yearned to burst of his body.

I could relate.

Because, I swear, every time I hear your voice I die.
and the only feasible cure
is to sever my soul out from it's cell.
to slice my skin from ankle to thigh,
from wrist to torso,
like the time I butchered a bison in South Dakota.
I'd peel back my ribs and hold my breath
because I've never seen anything so close to reprieve before.

and I imagined the sky breaking away from the stars,
and my soul floating back into the Womb.
and they say, in heaven, there is no pain.
your heart mended, and your skeleton reset.

It's hard to imagine
from the bed in your nursing home.
Yearning to hear your mothers voice,
and to feel your wife's breath on your neck.
wanting to be able to sit up and take a drink from your cup
without someone you barely know putting the straw to your lips.
Craving to skip rocks across the Atlantic ocean
and to see what Utah looks like from the top of a mountain.

I think all I know is pain.
I think, every year, I'm afraid the trees wont replenish in the spring

what if someone told you, you could never sing?

and I imagine him,
soul cut free,
standing at the shore of the sea,
chest expanding with salty air.
His arms stretched out,
like it was the first time he'd ever seen the ocean.
He can't think of anything more perfect.

I prayed that night I'd see him in heaven.
That God would hear his rhythmic breathing.
That the angels in heaven breathed that rhythm with him,
welcoming him home.

Ever since I was little, I imagined Jesus to be the face on the moon.
And I hoped so hard my lungs burst that he could see Jesus, too.
out the tiny window in his room at the nursing home.
That the illumination would at least make his heart warm.

and there was so much hope that night,
that for a moment,
I swore we were both already in hell.

But, I like to think every time God says, "well done my good and faithful servant."
He gets so excited he forgets to breathe.
that His heart swells so big, sunsets couldn't even compare.

and I hope he's there.

What's the first thing you remember creating?

I distinctly remember when I was a child drawing myself as someone I'd rather be or someone I wanted to be. Sometimes it was me, but somewhere else. It's a funny thing that no one ever questioned that. But, I think it said a lot for where I was as a child. The things I dealt with. What I saw. Heard.

What's the first thing you remember creating?

Disc golf if this thing I've been playing recently and I think it's pretty great and I'm glad I gave it a chance.

The Stars.

Monday my friend Libby, Alesia and I embarked on a road trip to New Hampshire and Conneticut. We began the adventure with a trip to Manhatten, stayed at Libby's parents in Conneticut then made it to New Hampshire. Today, we expolored a little bit of nature. Libby and I found some beaver dams by this small marsh which was ABSOLUTLEY beautiful. The water was reflecting the sky in such detail you couldn't tell what was up and what was down. The green mountains in the landscape made it even more amazing. The feeling of travel, the feeling of GeoJourney came rushing back in. It all hit me tonight, though.

The stars in New Hampshire are incredible. I missed those stars SO much since GeoJourney. There's something about a Bowling Green sky that just doesn't cut it. It's just not there. But tonight, the stars. They just splattered the sky so beautifully and perfectly. They were abundant and the composition was spot on. It was a masterpiece.

When I was staring at them (which I could have done forever) I felt like I couldn't make reason of it. I am so small yet God cares about me so much that my very eyes get to see this beauty. It brought me great joy. My joy was as vast as the sky.

It's what I've been waiting for. The whole fucking shitty winter. My soul was tired and craving this so much it hurt. It pained me to the core. It made me crumple like napkin poetry that wasn't good enough. But, this time, what I've been waiting for came. Tonight. And it was so good.

I very much needed the reminder. I needed the reminder of vastness and freedom and beauty. I know because it is not so often that I get to see the stars like that, it makes it so much sweeter. I will mourn the loss of these stars for the next few months when I get back to Ohio. But, I'll be back to a place where you can see them. Where they are bright and vibrant and abuandant and scattered across the sky in such perfection that it almost hurts to look at because it's so beautiful. And you yell "THIS IS INSANE!" and your heart feels squeezed and your stomach turns like a crush and it is just so wonderful.

I loved tonight. I tried to soak it up the best I could. I need these nights of nature.